Life can sometimes be
like being on a fairground ride,
like being on a rollercoaster -
because so much of our time
is spent doing the same things
in a repeating cycle;
however, no matter how much nostalgia
we feel for a time, or for a place, in the past,
if and when we attempt to go backwards
and in reverse then we may only find
heartbreak waiting for us -
especially when we realise that
we can only stay where we used to be
for a short time before returning
to the present, to the now, to who we are,
to the knowledge of what happened, what changed,
and who we have lost along the way.
Returning to the past can be difficult;
returning to the past can be challenging;
returning to the past can be painful;
returning to what was can sometimes
shine a light upon what was pushed
into the shadows of your mind for a reason
that you may have forgotten about;
returning to the path of memory lane
can make you realise where, when, why,
and how things changed for the best,
as well as for the worse.
Life can sometimes feel like a constant uphill struggle;
life can sometimes feel like a Summer’s kiss;
life can sometimes feel like a fever dream;
life can sometimes feel like something is happening
that you can’t control or understand,
but you have to make the best of it;
life can sometimes feel like a constant
storm of emotions and feelings
that you have to overcome;
life can sometimes feel like
it has been a long time coming
since things were simple and made sense.
Returning to the origins of a story;
returning to the muse of inspiration;
returning to the flash that started
the tidal wave of creativity;
returning to the source of rejuvenation;
returning to that which opened doors to other places,
which lead to meeting other people,
in sometimes new, interesting, and unexpected ways,
can remind us of why we are all, mostly,
hopeful of a better world,
and optimistic of what possibilities
the future of tomorrow might bring;
however, though it is nice to find things
and to see things that we haven’t
seen in some time,
and though it is initially good to see
people we may not have been
in the presence of for sometime,
there is always a cost to be paid,
to be taken, and to be made,
if you ever want, if you ever need,
or if you ever feel like you must go back
and return to the beginning.
Mental health
My Poem “Dreams Come True”
As far back as I can remember,
I have always been a creator…
when I was younger,
I used to draw, I used to paint,
I used to use colour to express myself –
however, for some time now
I have used words and language
to paint a picture within someone’s mind
of what I see, what I believe, what I think about,
and what excites my imagination in such a way
that I am inspired to write about something
that I have never written before.
As far back as my memory goes,
I have always been someone who
can never stop asking questions
and looking for answers that I know
are there to be found –
like a detective, I have always believed
that if you keep going then every day
you will discover something new
that will further unveil a new layer
to life’s endless possibilities,
mysteries, secrets, and stories.
When I was younger,
I always gravitated towards,
and I was always spellbound by,
the characters that I saw in films and TV shows,
as well the songs that I heard on the radio
that all seemed to be conveying something
deep and profound about the human experience
that made me feel something akin to a spiritual awakening:
because what I saw, and what I heard,
touched and implanted something inside of me
that would take years to grow into
whatever it is that sustains me
and never stops inspiring me.
As far back as I can tell -
though I was not always as gifted
as I am these days at grasping the reasons
why things happen and why people do what they do –
I have always believed that
the best things in life are always
the things that make us happy
and fill us with joy and love,
and if we are lucky enough
to one day find certain people in the world
who are willing to take a chance on us,
and give us a little bit of their time,
to show them who we are
and what makes us different
from everyone else,
then anything is possible,
anything can happen,
and anything that can be imagined
can be made real and can change the way
that people perceive the world,
as well as the universe.
When I was a child, everything –
time in particular –
seemed to take forever to change;
however, these days it feels like
every moment seems to fly by
and I don’t get enough time
to take something for what it is,
or what it could be,
and see where it takes me,
because there is always
something else to do,
somewhere else to be,
and there is always news of someone else
who was there one minute
but who seemingly, in the blink of an eye,
left us without a word for the world to come.
As far back as any of us
can go back in our thoughts,
and as far back as any of us can sometimes
see echoes of what we have done,
where we have been,
and who we have known throughout our lives,
there is nothing that is more important, significant,
nor a more powerful part of our existence
than the fact that we get to live
and we are free to do
whatever we choose
with what we are gifted with
to make up our own minds about
what we want our future to be
and what we need to do to make
our words and our dreams come true.
My Poem “Square One”
Just like in the game of Monopoly
when everybody first arrives in this world
they start with the word “Go”,
and then they roll the dice
that will decide for them
where the game they are
involved in will take them –
and the rules of life
are similar to the rules of a game:
each of us start somewhere,
each of us are given a name,
each of us are given choices,
and as we learn more about
who we are and what motivates us
we find ourselves being pulled
down particular paths,
by particular things,
by particular people,
into making decisions
that will effect the rest of our lives.
No one in this life
is immune to influence –
because our brains are driven
by stimulation and information,
even from a young age…
no one can stop themselves
from making the “wrong choice” –
because up until a choice or a move
has been played to its conclusion
there is no way of knowing
the outcome of anything…
everybody dreams of becoming
something or someone when they are a child –
something or someone
who they see and want to emulate;
but I wonder how many people
actually became who they wanted to be
when they grew up,
if they did what they wanted to do,
and if they became who they wanted to be
when they were a kid?
Life has a way of making certain things happen,
while other things never get off the drawing-board…
people have a way of changing
their minds more frequently than they would think under certain circumstances…
the terrain that people think
will always stay the same
has a way of being remade
that cannot simply be returned
to how it used to be –
because nothing, no one,
and nowhere stays untouched
by outside influences.
From the moment that
the necessary components of our planet
coalesced and began to slowly
but surely evolve into
the wild testbed of experimentation
that it will always be,
even before humanity entered
the mix and started effecting
the world by any and all means,
Earth has been visited from space
many times by its fellow
celestial cousins
and it has continued to
thrive and go with the flow
of whatever course
plays out upon its surface.
Everything and everybody
begins their journey with
whatever and whomever
they have at their disposal,
and then, before long,
everything and everyone
finds themselves being
taken to places that they
do not choose to be –
but places where others want them to be;
and that is when the seeds
of rebellion are first sowen,
that is when the first ideas
of defiance start to get louder and louder –
until every individual decides to do something for them
and for no one else,
and that is when it starts:
that is when the power of chance
can start to change the map
of the world within our mind
and start to alter our opinion
of what we are here to do
and who we are supposed to be.
We all think that we will not
make the mistakes that similar people in our shoes have made in the past…
we all think that we can somehow
be different from other people
if we have “more” of something
than someone else…
we all think that we might get to see
something that no one else has ever seen,
or experience something
that no one has ever done before;
but each of us discover
that we are all constantly stuck
in a loop of repetition
that is hard to break free of –
especially when we find out that
there are powers in the world
that wish to control others
into thinking and believing
that one way is the only way
and supercedes all others…
we all think that there is a way
to see something before it happens,
and perhaps prevent the inevitable –
but time and time again
each of us are given a wake up call
that reminds us that some things
will always happen
because they were always meant to happen:
including proceeding down a path
for as long and for as far as we can
before realizing that we have
actually returned to where we were
and have to start over again
from Square One.
My Poem “Relationship’s End”
A relationship doesn't just happen,
a relationship takes time
to build, to grow, to change...
a relationship can begin
in many different places,
at many different times,
for many different reasons,
and in many different ways...
a relationship does not have
an established timeline, a map,
nor a explanation as to when
and how things will happen
over the course of it, nor why -
because a relationship must be allowed
to become what it is supposed to be.
When it comes to relationships,
you cannot compare
the relationship you have with someone
to the one shared by other people,
because every relationship is unique...
when it comes to knowing
what to do while in a relationship,
no one can know what is the right thing
and what is the wrong thing to do -
because no matter how much time
you spend committed to making
a relationship last as long as it can,
nor how hard you try,
things will undoubtedly happen
that will push every bond to its limit,
and cracks will ultimately start to form,
and one day -
through no fault of any one person -
a relationship, like a mirror,
might shatter into pieces
because of all the stress
it finds itself under.
Sometimes relationships end
because they have to,
because they were always meant to -
however, when you look back
over the path you made with someone,
you can see where things started
to slowly but surely go wrong
from all the clues
that were always there to be found...
when a relationship is no more,
and you have to walk away from someone
who used to mean something profound to you,
it can be easy to blame yourself
for why things went from good to bad -
but sometimes some things
are just not meant to last,
because sometimes when we catch up,
and then we go beyond,
what we always thought
a relationship would be
all we start to see
are all our chances to leave,
all the escape routes,
all the ways out we can use
to return to a state of being
when and where we are accountable
to no one else's actions but our own.
My Poem “Lost Trust”
I have always believed
that trust was one of the most
important things in life
that can be given
and one of the most
painful things that can be lost;
however, the problem with trust
is that people are not always trustworthy -
people lie, but they always have
a reason and a motive
for why they do what they do,
and for why they say what they say.
I have been told that I am näive
when it comes to making a decision
when it comes to helping others
as well as too quick to
open my heart too easily
for others to take advantage of -
and though it pains me to admit it,
I am, and I have always been,
someone who has worn my heart on my sleeve,
and I have always given more
than I have received:
and I have been told that
that is the sign of a good person.
I am not sure if I am a "good person" -
but what I do know is that there are
people in this world who use others,
who cheat on others,
who have no respect for others,
and when it comes to making a choice
between what they want
and what others want
some people will always choose
to be selfish every time.
The number of people
whom I have trusted over my life
began small when I was younger,
and then, of course, began to grow bigger over time;
however, now I could probably count
on one hand the people
who I truly trust and why.
Love is not the allie of mine
that I used to think it was;
people have seldom been truthful with me;
my love is something I have
been too readily to offer another -
but I am here to say
that is about to change.
I have been hurt one too many times;
I have had my opinion of people
repeatedly overturned more
times than I can count;
I have done things for others
in the past the instant that they asked -
but now I am not so sure
if my ability to trust people
like I used to will ever return,
because I am recovering
from all the years and all the scars
of being psychologically,
as well as emotionally, burned.
All my muses have left me...
all who once aided my creativity
and made me believe that they loved me
have found someone else to leach from...
all I have left is what
and who truly matter to me -
those who can rest assured
that I will be there for them,
just as they have always been there for me,
because our pull to one another
is the strongest force of the universe.
All I know for sure is that
what has been lost will never return -
but one day, perhaps,
I will discover that I have
more faith to offer
and that not all my trust
has been lost.
My Poem “There is no tomorrow”
It is good to dream,
and it is good to be a dreamer...
it is good to believe,
and it is good to be a believer...
it is good to send out a message of hope
into the universe without knowing
if you will ever receive a reply...
it is good to make a list of things
you want to do and places
you want to visit before you can't...
we all wish that some things
could be different and that we could
somehow go back and change what happened;
however, we are not meant
to have the power of a god,
we are not meant to live beyond
the last day of our destined journey,
we are not meant to know everything -
but each and every one of us,
right this second, have something
that we have in common:
an opportunity to choose
where we will go next, why, and how.
The past is fixed, indellible,
and what happened before is what it is...
the present is where we find ourselves now -
and everybody knows that
there is something important they want to do,
there is somewhere that they want to be,
and, usually, it is doing something else
and being somewhere else
than where they are...
the future does not exist until it does -
and, for most people, the future
is so far away and so illusive
that they do not realise
they have arrived there
until they take a look around
and see how much things
and people have changed...
every day we are alive
we are travelling into the world to come -
and as we get older
each day seems to
pass us by faster and faster,
as if we have all unwittingly
always be the participants within a race.
In life, we all lose more than we gain;
but it is over the course of our life
that we get to experience
and witness moments like no other,
and there is no better time
than today, and right away,
to do what you want to do,
to go where you want to go,
and to be with whoever
wants to be with you -
because when it comes to
making a choice that will
effect your life forever
the present is all that matters,
because there is no tomorrow.
Happy World Mental Health Day 2023!
My Poem “Hug” 🫂
For too long now so many people have been deprived of many vital things: work, travel, entertainment, and most importantly physical interactions with friends and family - but now we have all been given the permission to engage in "cautionary hugs"; if there could ever be such a thing? Never the less, it is now permissable for people to embrace their love ones in close quarters and show physical affection for someone openly for all the world to see... even though the virus plaguing the world continues to rage in variations across the planet, some of us are now able to meet up and talk with someone, inside somewhere, in ways that for so long have felt like distant memories or the stuff of dreams. It's has been so long now since people were able to kiss, hug, and be with people who they know so well, and it has been so long since people have been able to interact with someone of significance, face to face, that it will undoubtedly be hard for some people at first to revert back to how people used act without thinking with one another... some people might be more than a little reticent to eat inside a restaurant, or to sit in close proximity to someone who they do not personally know - because they may have lost the meaning and the importance at the heart of why people want and need to have close associations with other people for the benefit of their own mental health. I realize that everybody has their own individual process when attempting to adapt to rapid differences in circumstance - and we all know how hard it was when we were first told that we had to stay apart, that we had keep our distance, and that we had to protect ourselves from what we might be unwittingly exposed to; but there comes a time when enough is enough - and to me, as long as the world proceeds with caution down this long and winding road back to normality, and as long as people continue to volunteer to do their part and be vaccinated for the good of the many, then why not give people to right to have something and to give something meaningful to someone else as simple, and as a much needed and long overdue, as a hug.
markthepoet.me 