I have always believed
that trust was one of the most
important things in life
that can be given
and one of the most
painful things that can be lost;
however, the problem with trust
is that people are not always trustworthy -
people lie, but they always have
a reason and a motive
for why they do what they do,
and for why they say what they say.

I have been told that I am näive
when it comes to making a decision
when it comes to helping others
as well as too quick to
open my heart too easily
for others to take advantage of -
and though it pains me to admit it,
I am, and I have always been,
someone who has worn my heart on my sleeve,
and I have always given more
than I have received:
and I have been told that
that is the sign of a good person.

I am not sure if I am a "good person" -
but what I do know is that there are
people in this world who use others,
who cheat on others,
who have no respect for others,
and when it comes to making a choice
between what they want
and what others want
some people will always choose
to be selfish every time.

The number of people
whom I have trusted over my life
began small when I was younger,
and then, of course, began to grow bigger over time;
however, now I could probably count
on one hand the people
who I truly trust and why.

Love is not the allie of mine
that I used to think it was;
people have seldom been truthful with me;
my love is something I have
been too readily to offer another -
but I am here to say
that is about to change.

I have been hurt one too many times;
I have had my opinion of people
repeatedly overturned more
times than I can count;
I have done things for others
in the past the instant that they asked -
but now I am not so sure
if my ability to trust people
like I used to will ever return,
because I am recovering
from all the years and all the scars
of being psychologically,
as well as emotionally, burned.

All my muses have left me...
all who once aided my creativity
and made me believe that they loved me
have found someone else to leach from...
all I have left is what
and who truly matter to me -
those who can rest assured
that I will be there for them,
just as they have always been there for me,
because our pull to one another
is the strongest force of the universe.

All I know for sure is that
what has been lost will never return -
but one day, perhaps,
I will discover that I have
more faith to offer
and that not all my trust
has been lost.